haha =] life sucks.

blaah. ever sit around and wonder "what if" and it just makes you feel shitty. please someone smack me .

Today was pretty eventful... school. haunted house. mall. sv game. ashley's.now im just chilling at my grandmas..kind of bored now though.

So, I write poetry to let things go, i guess you could say?...so here's a poem. enjoy.:::::

The only promises you can ever trust are the ones you make
The only heart you'll ever heal is the one you can't break
The only questions left unanswered are the ones you never ask
The only chance you have at a future is by forgetting the past
The only love you will ever know is the love you've lost
The only way you'll cope with time is by paying time's cost
The only way you will embrace strength is by learning how to loose
The only abuse that provides meaning is when it leaves a bruise
The only fear you need to conquer is the fear to live
The only way you can receive is by learning how to give
The only door that will open is the one you take the effort to pull
The only time you'll quit being an actor is when you give up the role
The only truth you should embrace is the truth you don't want to hear
The only weakness that makes you stronger is the weakness you cant bare
The only fantasy you'll ever encounter is the fantasy that you dream
The only way you'll accept reality is when you figure out that life
is not always as it seems


So yeah, kind of long. but when I can't figure out what to say, a pencil and paper never fails me. Imma nerd like that.

So i am probably moving to either New Mexico//England//Italy to go to a boarding school called United World College. It's a 2 year school to go to before college, where you get a lot of secondary education and it's really good for your future. Plus you meet a bunch of people from around the world, and over the weekends you do community service.
So I got a letter to apply for the Davis Merit scholarship, and if I am one of the 25 that get selected to go to UWC-USA then they pay for everything, tuition, room and board, books..or if im one of the 25 that get selected to go to one of their other campuses in another county then I think i'm going to go.
Missing my senior year of high school sounds pretty brutal, but this is the chance of a lifetime and i dont think im going to pass it up...Apparently I have a lot of thinking to do.